Breaking the Shame Barrier Around Men’s Emotions
Breaking the Shame Barrier Around Men’s Emotions Exploring why men
Breaking the Shame Barrier Around Men’s Emotions
Exploring why men struggle to express how they feel — and how homeopathy can help, gently and holistically
Kate Howard RSHom
Homeopath and CHE PRO Community Manager
Last week was Men’s Health Week, a time to raise awareness of the unique challenges men face in caring for their physical and emotional wellbeing.
While conversations around physical health are slowly becoming more open, one area remains steeped in silence: men’s emotional health. Many men still struggle to express how they feel — and when they do, it’s often clouded by shame, self-judgement, or fear of being misunderstood.
At the heart of this silence is a deeper issue: a culture that equates vulnerability with weakness — and conflict with failure.
Why Is It So Hard for Men to Express Emotion?
From childhood, many boys are taught — directly or subtly — that to show sadness, tenderness, or fear is unmanly. They may be told to “man up,” “don’t cry,” or “stop being soft.” Over time, this teaches them to:
- Distrust or ignore their emotional signals
- Feel ashamed of internal struggles
- Express emotions through withdrawal, irritability, or conflict avoidance
- Suppress feelings to maintain control or avoid “rocking the boat”
Many men learn to avoid conflict and confrontation at all costs, even if it means compromising their truth or bottling up intense emotions. But what goes unspoken doesn’t go away — it often lodges in the body as stress-related illness, fatigue, low libido, or anxiety.
Homeopathy: A Gentle Pathway Inward
One of the most powerful things about homeopathy is that it sees the whole person — not just the diagnosis or the symptoms, but the story underneath.
For men who find it hard to speak openly, homeopathy offers a non-invasive, non-judgemental way to begin addressing those deep, often buried emotions — including the fear of confrontation and the effort it takes to constantly maintain calm.
Even when a man can’t fully articulate what’s wrong, a well-chosen remedy can help unlock stuck emotions and support the nervous system, gently encouraging healing and release.
That said, emotional suppression is rarely a surface issue, and the best results come under the care of a qualified professional homeopath who can hold space safely and select remedies based on the full picture.
Homeopathic Remedies That May Help
Here are some remedy profiles often seen in men struggling with shame, suppression, and conflict aversion. These are shared for educational purposes and not as a substitute for professional care:
🔹 Ignatia amara – For Hidden Grief and Loss
Ideal for men who have suffered loss or heartbreak but feel unable to cry or express it. Their emotions are volatile but often tightly held in check.
Emotional keynote: silent suffering, internalised sadness, aversion to confrontation due to fear of emotional overwhelm.
🔹 Staphysagria – For Buried Anger and Humiliation
For the man who swallows his anger to keep the peace. He may appear gentle or submissive but carries a well of resentment and hurt beneath the surface. Often avoids standing up for himself to avoid conflict.
Emotional keynote: repressed rage, low self-worth, fear of confrontation, urinary or sexual complaints linked to unexpressed emotions.
🔹 Aurum metallicum – For Despair Beneath Responsibility
This remedy suits high-achieving, responsible men who feel a deep sense of failure or loss of purpose. Conflict is often internalised, as these men blame themselves rather than upset others.
Emotional keynote: guilt, despair, self-criticism, avoidance of emotional confrontation to preserve order.
🔹 Lycopodium clavatum – For Hidden Insecurity Behind Control
Lycopodium men often appear confident but feel deeply insecure. They may fear failure and confrontation, especially in relationships or professional settings, using control or avoidance as protective mechanisms.
Emotional keynote: fear of inadequacy, low self-confidence, digestive upset before confrontation or decision-making.
🔹 Natrum muriaticum – For The Quietly Wounded
This remedy is for those who have built emotional walls after rejection or grief. They prefer solitude, avoid emotional intimacy, and dislike being questioned or challenged.
Emotional keynote: stoicism, aversion to sympathy, withdrawal from emotional conflict or vulnerability.
A Note for Home Prescribers
As home prescribers, it can be tempting to reach for a remedy when we see a loved one suffering — especially if we recognise the emotional patterns. But when deep emotional themes, longstanding mental health issues, or shame-based behaviour are present, the most helpful action is often referral.
A trained homeopath will explore the man’s full emotional history, physical symptoms, and energetic state, and offer tailored, professional support. Sometimes just offering that referral can be a healing act in itself — affirming that men deserve care, space, and support too.
What Men Need to Hear
If you’re reading this as a partner, friend, practitioner, or parent — consider this a quiet reminder that what men often need most is not fixing, but witnessing. They need:
- Permission to feel
- Space to speak without being “solved”
- Support in learning that conflict isn’t shameful — it’s human
- And access to healing modalities that support body and mind
Homeopathy can be one of those modalities — when offered with sensitivity and with the backing of professional guidance.
Final Thought
Men’s Health Week might be over, but the work of dismantling shame and supporting emotional wellbeing continues.
Let’s keep the conversation going — not just around cholesterol and back pain, but around grief, fear, vulnerability, and the deep desire to be heard without judgment or shame.
Because true health begins where truth is allowed.
Podcast! Beyond the Shed: Expanding Horizons in Men's Conversations
Hosted by Marcus Fernandez and John Stevens.
“Beyond the Shed” is a powerful podcast tackling the real, often unspoken issues men face today—from mental health and emotional wellbeing to identity, fatherhood, and societal pressure.
Each episode creates a safe, relatable space for honest conversations that help men connect, reflect, and grow in a rapidly changing world.
Check out the podcast below!
Disclaimer
The content shared here is intended for informational purposes only and should not be considered a replacement for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment from a qualified and licensed healthcare provider. The views and opinions expressed in this presentation are those of the presenter and do not necessarily represent those of CHE or any affiliated organizations.
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